"Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."
Um, ouch...
This was literally what I needed to hear, and it was SO applicable to my life that I actually started smiling when the pastor read it because I knew God was using it to speak directly to me in that moment... It was one of those, "Okay, I get it, God. You made your point," moments. It wasn't what I wanted to be reminded of, but I know it was necessary. Up to that point, I had been ignoring God's little reminders and nudges that I needed to let go and forgive...which was pretty easy to do because it was always between me and myself (conversations in my own head), if that makes sense. I could talk myself out of forgiving pretty easily. However, hearing that verse from Ephesians spoken out loud by someone else brought me to my senses, so to say.
Get RID of all bitterness, rage, and anger. The Scripture is pretty clear... It doesn't leave any room for misunderstanding, as hard as we might try to make it appear less strict. Get RID of bitterness and anger. That is an imperative... a command! We are to get RID of bitterness and anger.
These verses aren't saying to TRY to get rid of it, and they aren't saying to get rid of them halfway. It also isn't saying to squash those feelings down or ignore them. We are supposed to get rid of anger and bitterness completely! God doesn't want us to hold on to them, which to be honest is so easy to do.
Up to that moment, I'll be completely honest, I had been holding on to anger, and even some bitterness. I kept telling myself that I was letting go and forgiving, but deep inside, I think I knew that I wasn't truly doing so. While I was letting go on the surface, I was hanging on tightly to the anger and the bitterness deep inside. I felt entitled to it, like I had a RIGHT to be angry. It was easy to rationalize it, thinking that I could allow myself to be angry just a little bit without it affecting my heart.
WRONG.
Oh so wrong.
God tells us to get rid of anger and bitterness for a reason. They eat away at you, little by little, until they consume you. They lead to hatred.
Oh, be careful little heart what you let in.
"Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." Proverbs 4:23
In my mind, I had always connected guarding your heart with purity (as in, relationships, and the like), but I'm realizing how much more there is to guarding your heart! Guarding your heart doesn't just have to do with relationships, it also has to do with what YOU allow into your heart. As Christ followers, we are called to guard our hearts from things that are impure, things that are idolatrous, and things that are dangerous.
Things like anger.
Things like bitterness.
When we are told to get rid of anger and bitterness, it's a matter of the heart. If we allow those things into our minds, into our lives, and into our hearts, we are putting ourselves in danger, and we are welcoming something that could potentially destroy us!
Instead of bitterness and anger, we are called to forgiveness. And what a wonderful example we have in Christ! In my mind, He had every reason to be angry or bitter about the situations He faced and the rejections/hurts/insults/unfair treatment He received. Instead, He chose forgiveness.
Last week in that meeting, I finally let go. I chose forgiveness over anger and bitterness. And honestly, it's been hard at times to not take the anger/bitterness back into my own hands, but I know that I'm so much better off choosing forgiveness and leaving the rest in God's able hands.
Anger and bitterness will imprison you, consume you, and ultimately destroy you.
So guard your heart. ("I keep a close watch on this heart of mine...")
Choose forgiveness, and be set free.
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